Sunday, May 17, 2015

Let's Talk. Ending the Stigma.

As part of Mental Health Awareness month, I have been trying to post something (usually many somethings) on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to help bring awareness to at least the small community of people I know - or who follow me.  During these last few weeks, I have had several people reach out to me thanking me for my posts, sharing their own stories, or simply giving me love.  To those, I say thank you.  The biggest reason I want to flood my social media forums with so much information is because I'm really tired of the stigma that is associated with mental health.  No one wants to talk about it.  And my question is: Why aren't we talking about it?  I think I know the answer: there is a stigma, but what does it look like?

Allow me to shed some light.

Stigma is.....

- Having a boss who, when you have a breakdown at work, sits as far away from you as possible and asks why you never shared this with her because sometimes she "feels out of it too" and "gets bummed".

- Having co-workers who will send "Get Well!" cards to people who had out-patient surgery, but not to you when you spend a week in the Behavioral Health Unit.  Actually, it's having no one from your job "community" check in on you in any way.

- Having a boss who, when you go to collect your things from the job you can no longer work at because it's a trigger, comes no closer to you than the door frame.

- Having the same boss get a frightened look on her face when you ask to borrow a pair of scissors.

- Having former co-workers go around telling people that you "went nuts" and are "crazy" because you "flipped out for no reason" at work.

- Hearing people misuse the term "bipolar" to you when talking about someone whose mood changes.

- When someone asks if I've tried "just not thinking about it".

- When people suggest that someone is "schizo" because they are joking about having more than one personality.

- When people ask: "So it's ok for you to be around kids for your job?"

- When people ask: "Well, if there is no test for it, then how do know you really have it?"

- When people ask: "What about your daughter? Are you ever like that in front of her?"

- When people suggest that I might freak out at any time.

- When I'm not allowed to get pissed off or angry because I'm having an "episode".

I could keep going, but I think/hope you get the idea.  No wonder why people who have mental illness don't want to talk. Why would they?  When someone says that there is an issue with their mental health, it is automatically assumed that they can't be trusted or are unstable or unsafe to be around.  Yes, there are some who will accept them, but it's not a given.  It also doesn't help when bad news is reported and the person who is guilty is said to have been suffering from a mental illness, thus associating mental health with negativity.  Just like any other illness, when managed, a person can live a very healthy and productive life.

What I would love is for mental health and screenings to be as frequently talked about as getting tested for AIDS or checking for lumps in your breasts or testicles.  I would love it if friends and loved ones were as quick to suggest getting a check up for mental health symptoms like they would be about a cough or pain that hasn't gone away in a month or two.  Mental health has stages just like any other illness.  You wouldn't wait until you or a loved one displayed symptoms of a disease at stages 3 or 4, so why does it have to be that way for mental health?

Do you want to know what you can do?  It's simple really.  If you are in a conversation with someone and they make an unkind comment about mental health, correct them the same way you would if they had said AIDS is the "gay disease" or anything else that is false.  If you know and love someone who just doesn't seem like themselves, ask them if they are feeling ok and have seen a doctor.  Go with them if they are afraid or need help.  If you know someone who has an illness, be a support system for them. Don't know how to do that? There are TONS of resources online - NAMI or Bring Change 2 Mind are two good ones to check out.  Don't know about a specific mental illness? Google it and read up on it so you can be informed.  There are a ton - anything that causes the brain to function differently is a mental health condition; some are more serious than others.  Just like any other illness or disease.  I have been posting a ton of information on my Facebook - repost it.  Everyone is quick to change their profile pics or covers for national pride or AIDS awareness or any other cause, why not this?  Mental Health Awareness Month is only for the month of May - think you could change your profile pic and/or cover for the next two weeks?  Help start the conversation.  Help stop the stigma.





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