The other day I had to stop at Harris Teeter on my way home to pick up a few things we had run out of at home. It took me about 15 solid minutes to find a parking spot. These are a few of the things that ran through my head.
1. OMG, everyone and their mama picked this time to head to the store! Great.
2. Sure, that's fine. Just pull out in front of my car. I'm not really here.
3. Oooh, where are you headed, sir? I will stalk your ass to your spot.
4. MOTHERFUCKER!
5. Oooh...coming or going, coming or going?
6. Damnit, they pulled out the stroller.
7. Yes! A spot! Whoo hoo!
8. DAMN YOU HANDICAPPED SPOT WITHOUT A SIGN!
9. Sweet! What? "Reserved for Expectant Mothers". I wonder if I'm chunky enough to pass as one...
10. Motherfucking small cars/motorcycles!
11. Dude! Why the fuck are you stopped in the middle of the damn lane? Seriously?
12. Oh, you're on your fucking cell phone. Get off your goddamn phone and PAY ATTENTION!
13. Finally, someone leaving!
14. Shit. They had their blinker on first.
15. I swear I have been down this aisle like 800 times.
16. This asshole is taking up two spots! Two! I should key his fucking car.
17. Ok, lady, I have a kid too and it does NOT take THAT long to get them in and out of the car.
18. I see people leaving with groceries, but where the hell is their car? Where the fuck did they park? Narnia??
19. Lady, I swear to God if you hit my car with your cart.....
20. Ok, I'm trailing this guy to his car. This is ridiculous.
21. Yes, I am following you, and I don't give a shit how long you take, I am NOT leaving.
22. Oh, HELL no! I was here first. Respect the blinker, bitch.
23. Oh. My. God. What the hell are you doing in your car?!?! Leave already!!
24. You know what? I will wait here all night if necessary, motherfucker.
25. That's ok. Take your sweet ass time backing your car out.
26. Don't even THINK about taking this spot. I will cut you, bitch.
27. Finally!
28. Seriously?!? Where the hell were all these open spaces before???
1. OMG, everyone and their mama picked this time to head to the store! Great.
2. Sure, that's fine. Just pull out in front of my car. I'm not really here.
3. Oooh, where are you headed, sir? I will stalk your ass to your spot.
4. MOTHERFUCKER!
5. Oooh...coming or going, coming or going?
6. Damnit, they pulled out the stroller.
7. Yes! A spot! Whoo hoo!
8. DAMN YOU HANDICAPPED SPOT WITHOUT A SIGN!
9. Sweet! What? "Reserved for Expectant Mothers". I wonder if I'm chunky enough to pass as one...
10. Motherfucking small cars/motorcycles!
11. Dude! Why the fuck are you stopped in the middle of the damn lane? Seriously?
12. Oh, you're on your fucking cell phone. Get off your goddamn phone and PAY ATTENTION!
13. Finally, someone leaving!
14. Shit. They had their blinker on first.
15. I swear I have been down this aisle like 800 times.
16. This asshole is taking up two spots! Two! I should key his fucking car.
17. Ok, lady, I have a kid too and it does NOT take THAT long to get them in and out of the car.
18. I see people leaving with groceries, but where the hell is their car? Where the fuck did they park? Narnia??
19. Lady, I swear to God if you hit my car with your cart.....
20. Ok, I'm trailing this guy to his car. This is ridiculous.
21. Yes, I am following you, and I don't give a shit how long you take, I am NOT leaving.
22. Oh, HELL no! I was here first. Respect the blinker, bitch.
23. Oh. My. God. What the hell are you doing in your car?!?! Leave already!!
24. You know what? I will wait here all night if necessary, motherfucker.
25. That's ok. Take your sweet ass time backing your car out.
26. Don't even THINK about taking this spot. I will cut you, bitch.
27. Finally!
28. Seriously?!? Where the hell were all these open spaces before???
